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The following is a compilation of trailer transcripts for the 2012 sequel to the 2009 film Geoshea Theft Auto, Geoshea Theft Auto 2.

Comic-Con Teaser Trailer

(Shows MPAA green screen)

(Shows Universal Pictures logo)

(Shows 2Big3K logo)

(The screen fades to Earth in the outer space.)

Announcer: In a world...

(Shows a view of San Andreas)

Announcer: Well, actually San Andreas. Where fear reigns supreme and environmental laws have been disestablished as we know it, one hero is out there to stop it.

(The screen cuts to Norman Babcock walking in the street in Ganton, San Andreas and then finds a gun.)

Norman Babcock: Let's do this!

(Norman shoots the gun at the screen)

(The screen cuts to the Geoshea Theft Auto logo appears on a black screen. The number “2” appears underneath it a second after.)

Narrator: Geoshea Theft Auto 2.

(Shows the "3D" logo flying to the screen)

Announcer: In 3D.

(Shows “2012 in 3D”, “#GSTA2”, 2BIG3k print logo, Glass Ball print logo, Geoshea Films print logo, Rockstar Games print logo, copyright, and Universal Pictures print logo)

Narrator: Coming soon to a theater near you in 2012.

(Fades to black)

Teaser Trailer

(Shows MPAA green screen)

(Shows Universal Pictures logo)

(Shows 2BIG3k logo)

(Shows black & white clips from Geoshea Theft Auto and Geoshea World: The Movie while Adagio for Strings by Samuel Barber is playing)

Announcer: 2 years ago, Geoshea Films gave your their first feature film, Geoshea Theft Auto, based on the Grand Theft Auto games and Grand Theft Auto: Geoshea Edition. Then earlier this year, they brought you their second feature film, Geoshea World: The Movie, based on the TV series of the same name... Well, of the title Geoshea World and not of the title The Movie, of course. Just didn't want to confuse ya.

(The screen fades to black)

Announcer: But in 2012, the greatest sequel in movie history is finally coming to the big screen, with your favorite minion...

(Zooms out to show Stuart the Minion)

Announcer: Stuart!

Text: FROM THE CREATORS OF THE GEO TEAM

Announcer: From the creators of The Geo Team...

(Flashes to Norman Babcock yelling at Carl "CJ" Johnson)

Norman Babcock: NO! I'M NOT LEAVING THAT BITCH ALONE! STUART IS NOTHING BUT AN ASSHOLE!

Stuart: What did you call me?

(Norman turns to find Stuart and Buzzy behind him)

Norman Babcock: The Mario clones and the Ballas attacked your friends! Stuart, you'll love the Mario clones and the Ballas better than your friends! BETTER THAN YOUR GODDAMN FRIENDS!

(Stuart, looking enraged, attacks Norman, beating him bloody when when suddenly it cuts to the Geoshea Theft Auto 2 film logo flying to the screen)

Announcer: It's Geoshea Theft Auto 2!

(Shows the "3D" logo flying to the screen)

Announcer: In 3D!

(Shows "2012 IN 3D" text, 2BIG3k print logo, Glass Ball print logo, Geoshea Films print logo, Rockstar Games print logo, "THE FILM IS NOT YET RATED" text, website link, copyright and Universal Pictures print logo)

(Fades to black)

Theatrical Trailer 1

(Shows MPAA green screen)

(Shows Universal Pictures logo)

(Shows 2BIG3k logo)

(Shows flashing scenes from Geoshea Theft Auto and Geoshea World: The Movie)

Announcer: 2 years ago, Geoshea Films had created their first two feature films... Geoshea Theft Auto and Geoshea World: The Movie.

(Shows a camera pan of Stuart the Minion's light blue silhouette)

Announcer: But this year, they will be bringing you one of the year's best... and most unique brand of animation ever to be seen by the minion eye... by none other than...

(Shows Stuart the Minion in full color)

Announcer: Stuart... the Minion!

Text: THIS SPRING

Announcer: This Spring...

(Shows a scene at Los Santos Police Department)

Stuart: Police clones! Do not arrest me and my friends!

Text: ONLY ONE MINION

Announcer: Only one minion...

(Shows Stuart, Buzzy, Carl, Cesar, Sweet and the peds talking about the Mario clones)

Carl "CJ" Johnson: I don't know what the hell happened, but it's insane, man!

Stuart: (getting insane) Do I not feel happy to you?

Buzzy: (serious) No Stuart, you look insane.

(One of the peds starts charting)

Stuart: STOP!

Text: CAN SAVE THE DAY

Announcer: Can save the day...

(Shows Hatsune Miku getting beaten by Norman while Mario fights Miku, but CJ protects Miku)

Carl "CJ" Johnson: Leave them alone.

Norman Babcock: NO! I'M NOT LEAVING THAT BITCH ALONE! STUART IS NOTHING BUT AN ASSHOLE!

Stuart: What did you call me?

(Norman turns to find Stuart and Buzzy behind him)

Norman Babcock: The Mario clones and the Ballas attacked your friends! Stuart, you'll love the Mario clones and the Ballas better than your friends! BETTER THAN YOUR GODDAMN FRIENDS!

(Stuart looks over to Buzzy, then looking enraged he attacks Norman, beating him bloody when when suddenly it flashes to another scene)

Buzzy: Okay, what's going on here?

Carl "CJ" Johnson: I don't know. Maybe they are having a war.

(Stuart kills some of the peds)

Text: FROM THE CREATORS OF THE GEO TEAM

Announcer: From the creators of The Geo Team...

Amzi: Well, guys, you tried to stop me, but you cannot! In fact, you'll be dead by a rocket bomb! *evil laugh*

Text: PREPARE FOR

Announcer: Prepare for...

Buzzy: Don't worry, Stuart. I'll get that asshole!

(Buzzy sets a bomb on the roof of Mr. Krabs' car and it explodes)

Buzzy: I killed Mr. Krabs. Happy?

(Stuart smiles)

Buzzy: (confused) Why the hell are you smiling at?

(Shows the "Geoshea Theft Auto" film logo flying on the screen)

Announcer: Geoshea Theft Auto...

(A red "2" smashes on the screen)

Announcer: 2!

(A red oval with white text saying "IN 3D" smashes on the screen)

Announcer: In 3D!

(Cuts to Stuart the Minion talking to Norman Babcock about speaking Minionese)

Stuart: Norman, did you know I used to speak Minionese?

Norman Babcock: Say, uh... what's "Minionese"?

Stuart: Minionese is a language that the minions always speak. Minions also speak English sometimes. I used to speak all of the Minionese words such as "bello" and "papoi." Here's how I speak: (begins to speak Minionese) Da peoi balp koa era deo peoa doed gfhend.

(Shows red text saying "IN THEATERS MAY 25")

Announcer: In theaters May 25.

(Cuts to Norman Babcock talking to Stuart the Minion)

Norman Babcock: May I speak in Minionese too?

Buzzy: I also speak Minionese sometimes.

Stuart: Yes.

(Stuart, Buzzy, Norman and the other peds and minions talking in Minionese offscreen during a black screen with the credit block, 2BIG3k print logo, Glass Ball print logo, Geoshea Films print logo, Rockstar Games print logo, the "THIS FILM IS NOT YET RATED" text, website link, RealD 3D print logo, copyright and Universal Pictures print logo)

(Cuts to black)

Theatrical Trailer 2

Coming soon!

TV Spot 1

(Shows Universal Pictures 100th Anniversary logo)

(Shows 2BIG3K logo)

Text: ON MAY 25

Announcer: On May 25,

(Shows a scene at Los Santos Police Department)

Stuart: Police clones! Do not arrest me and my friends!

Text: ONLY ONE MINION

Announcer: Only One Minion...

Carl "CJ" Johnson; I don't know what the hell happened, but it's insane man!

Text: CAN SAVE THE DAY

Announcer: Can Save the day.

Norman Babcock: NO! I'M NOT LEAVING THAT BITCH ALONE! STUART IS NOTHING BUT AN ASSHOLE!

Text: FROM THE CREATORS OF THE GEO TEAM AND DESPICABLE ME

Announcer: From the creators of The Geo Team and Despicable Me,

Amzi: Well you guys try to stop me, but you can not! (laughs evilly)

Text: PREPARE FOR

Announcer: Prepare For,

Donald Duck: You son of a bitch!

(Shows the Geoshea Theft Auto logo flying onto the screen)

Announcer: Geoshea Theft Auto...

(A Red "2" Smashes the Screen)

Norman (off-screen): 2!

(cuts to Norman talking to Stuart)

Norman: May I speak Minionese too?

Buzzy: I also speak minionese sometimes.

Stuart: Yes.

(Stuart, Buzzy, Norman, and the other peds and minions talking in minionese offscreen during a black screen with the "In Theaters May 25th" text, the credit block, the 2Big3K print logo, Glass Ball print logo, Geoshea Films print logo, Rockstar Games print logo, MPAA PG-13 graphic, website link, RealD 3D print logo, copyright, and Universal Pictures 100th Anniversary Print logo)

Announcer: Rated PG-13. In Theatres May 25th.

TV Spot 2

(Shows Universal Pictures 100th Anniversary logo)

(Shows 2BIG3K logo)

Text: THIS SPRING

Announcer: This Spring...

(Norman turns to find Stuart and Buzzy behind him)

Norman Babcock: The Mario clones and the Ballas attacked your friends! Stuart, you'll love the Mario clones and the Ballas better than your friends! BETTER THAN YOUR GODDAMN FRIENDS!

Amzi: Well, guys, you tried to stop me, but you cannot! In fact, you'll be dead by a rocket bomb! *evil laugh*

Text: PREPARE FOR

Announcer: Prepare for...

Buzzy: Don't worry, Stuart. I'll get that asshole!

(Buzzy sets a bomb on the roof of Mr. Krabs' car and it explodes)

Buzzy: I killed Mr. Krabs. Happy?

(Stuart smiles)

Buzzy: (confused) Why the hell are you smiling at?

(Shows the "Geoshea Theft Auto" film logo flying on the screen)

Announcer: Geoshea Theft Auto...

(A red "2" smashes on the screen)

Announcer: 2!

Norman Babcock: NO! I'M NOT LEAVING SON OF A BITCH ALONE! STUART IS NOTHING BUT A...

Announcer: Can we cut to the chase, Norman?

Norman Babcock: Yes. NO! I'M NOT LEAVING THAT BITCH ALONE! STUART IS NOTHING BUT AN ASSHOLE!

(Shows a black screen with the credit block, the release date, 2BIG3k print logo, Glass Ball print logo, Geoshea Films print logo, Rockstar Games print logo, MPAA PG-13 graphic, website link, RealD 3D print logo, copyright and Universal Pictures print logo)

Announcer: Rated PG-13.

(Cuts to black)